PABA"S COUNSELLING

Don’t get a divorce at once, meet a counselor

If you are having nightmares, pray before you go to bed

Advices from Upeksha Swarnamali

Parliamentarian and the Tele-drama actress, Upeksha Swaramali hand in hand with the Lake House Publications have started a new column in Sarasaviya newspaper to answer the questions of the readers.

Answering a question of one of the readers in the article which was published today:
In the article which was published today, the answer she has given to a question raised by a woman was that:
Don’t take a abrupt decision to get a divorce… if you suspect so much go to a counselor with your husband.
The advice given to a daughter who was afraid to become an actress due to the rumours was that;
Don’t give up for the fear of the rumours, read the script and find out about the producers and take up acting.
The advice given on nightmares was;
Go to bed after prayers
The answer to the question whether to get involved in a love affair abhorred by the parents was;
Don’t ever get married by hurting parents.

View the article below:
She is not a person unknown to you. Stepping carefully in the arts filed, she slowly got close to the people. Going beyond she entered politics and went to the Parliament becoming a Member of Parliament setting an exemplary example to everyone.
In her journey she faced a lot of challenges and obstacles. From today onwards she will speak to your heart via Sarasaviya newspaper.
1.)    We married after been in a relationship. My husband is 10 years elder to me. We have a daughter who is 8 years old and a son who is 10n years old. Recently, he has started to suspect me. Now it has become difficult for us to stay under one roof. I am scared to get a divorce thinking that it will affect the future of our children.
Kusum- Awissawella
Don’t take a sudden decision to get a divorce. That kind of a decision can affect children’s mentality. They need the love and the protection of a father. If the two of you can’t talk this problem face to face, get the support of a relative or a close friend. Yet, if the husband suspects you through out, go to a counselor with your husband to seek advice.
If you don’t get a solution from any of these, get the necessary support from law.
2.)    My daughter likes to be an actress. Yet, I am scared to guide her because of the rumours.
Vishka Dharmasena- Katuidda Malgoda
Don’t be scared of the rumours. Don’t ever let your daughter be alone. It is better if you can find out about the producers, editors and the previous work they have done before taking over the contract..
3.)    I am a 23 year old girl. My mother left me and went abroad when I was small. My father too passed away and the children of his later marriage are troubling me. Now I am fed up of my life.
Anonymous
What you should do first is to strengthen yourself. Stop thinking about the past and try to be independent by getting yourself employed or occupied. Don’t ever let anybody control your life. Be optimistic.
4.)    My husband worked abroad. We have two kids. My younger son is in grade 8 and the daughter is in grade 10. Now my husband lives here. He is currently unemployed. We build our house from the money he earned. I asked him to do a job if he doesn’t want to go abroad again. He doesn’t like me working. Whenever this topic is brought up, we end up with a quarrel.
Kumari Rathnayake- Matara
It is really a pity to hear that there are husbands like that in our country. But as a solution to yours, I am proposing you to start a self- employment. If he still disagrees, try to get the intervention of your parents. If all these are not successful, let your husband feel the gravity of the economic struggle you are going through.
5.)    I saw a number of nightmares during the last few weeks. Is true that the nightmares come true? When I think of them, I forget my usual responsibilities.
  Himali Manisha- Rathmalpitiya
You see nightmares because you are scared of something. Pray before you go to bed. You will be relieved by that. Don’t try to relate dreams that come into your life.
6.)    I am working at a garment factory. My service contract is for 3 months. I got several proposals from the people who work there. Yet it is clear that none of them are genuine proposals. Even though I rejected them, they don’t like to accept it. What shall I do?
  Piyumi- Katunayaka
Be straight forward and reject the proposals. If you face problem from them, inform the authorities of your work place and inform your parents. If none of the above works, get the support of the law.
7.)    I was 4 years old when my father left me. My mother brought me up amidst a lot of difficulties. Now I have a boy friend. My mother knows about him and we got her blessing as well.Yet , recently she has started to hate our relationship. That is because one of my cousins who has had hoped on me had told her lies. My mother doesn’t believe in anything I say to her. I can’t hurt my mother or forget my boy friend. I am so helpless.
Dilrukshi- Gampaha
Don’t ever get married by hurting your mother. Try to win your mother’s heart by proving that your cousin is lying.